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5 Habits Expectant Dads Can Work on Right Now

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Kids Will Stick You For Your Paper

It’s obvious but smart financial management is one of the pillars of parenting. When a child comes into your life there are these new categories that you begin spending money on — weekly and monthly cash management becomes crucial.

In my experience, the whole money conversation almost overstated when it comes to infants — things like diapers can add up, but your main costs for infants is your time. But then comes grade school…and high school (let’s not even talk about college and college savings yet)…That’s when kids really start to invade your pockets.

I always say that “My wallet gets beaten to death $200 at a time.” There’s a constant outlay of cash — soccer registrations, field trips, school supplies, more school supplies, etc. etc.

People are often waiting for the perfect financial time to have kids — that may never happen. But it’s important to work on the habit of tracking spending and properly managing your cash, so you’re not hurting when those inevitable kid-related expenses come up.

Early Bird Gets The Worm

When you have a kid you obviously will still time for the stuff you gotta do — building your business, professional development, hobbies, etc. I have found that I’m personally able to get this stuff done really early in the morning.

I try to wake up at least an hour (easier said than done) before my kids on weekdays so that I can spend time reading, going for a jog — any of the things I need to do to have a productive day.

The other nice result here is that you are better prepared to engage with the kids when they jump out of bed like little balls of fire.

Get Productive on Weekends

Weekends are sacred gems that are to be protected with a might kung-fu grip. If you are used to spending your weekends watching every football game that comes on, you should start loosening up on that luxurious habit right now.

As the kids get older, weekends might be as busy if not more so than weekdays, so really mapping out your weekends and getting stuff done it critical.

Even if there is a big game on that you need to watch live, it will be helpful to think about the things you can still do to help around the house — folding baby laundry; Assembling that Ikea bookcase; emailing other parents to schedule drop-offs for the next week.

While relaxation is wildly necessary, there’s always something you can be doing during those early days of parenting to make your life easier during the valuable weekend afternoons. It took me a decade to learn this by the way.

Following the 80/20 Rule at Work

This one is pretty simple. If you’re expecting a child, now is great time to start maximizing your workday productivity. The 80/20 rule simply states that 20% of what you do gets 80% of the results.

Start to figure out what that critical 20% is now. With the little one about to invade your life you won’t have time to BS during your work day.

I also highly recommend the book Essentialism, by Greg McKeown.

Creating Systems Everywhere

My wife is probably the most systems focused person I know. And for good reason. If you think you need systemic thinking in the workplace, you probably need it 10x when it comes to the management of a family — especially as the kids get older.

While you’re waiting for the delivery day, spend some time thinking systemically about your life. What systems can you and your partner put in place to balance your relationship and the new addition with your careers, extended family and all the rest of life’s variables?

9 Quick Ways To Get Back Your Energy When You’re Feeling Tired

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As parents, we talk about it all the time…we’re always tired. We’re constantly trying to manage our energy any way we can. There’s always more work to do. We always want to be more energetic, more present, more engaged parents to our kids. But it’s an evergreen struggle.

Whenever I find some tips or strategies to help increase my energy, I’m willing to try it and see where it gets me.

Our friends at NeoMam Studios created an infographic highlighting 9 ways to restore energy when we need it the most.

9-quick-ways-V3-2

[Pound Place]

Dads, Let’s Do 2 Things Differently This Holiday Season

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I love the holiday season. It’s my favorite time of year. Being a parent has brought back what I loved about the holidays as a kid…times 10. I love how everything seemingly shuts down so people can spend time with family. I love giving and receiving gifts. I love cooking and eating and being an overall glutton for a few days. And I love how the holidays crescendo into the hope, wonder and clean slate of a new year.

But there is one thing I hate about the holidays. I hate how much pressure we put on it. It stresses us out. We worry. And by the time we’ve dealt with all that anxiety, the holidays are over and we’re back to the grind.

So let’s not do it this year. Let’s do 2 small things differently this holiday season…

First thing, let’s get organized and plan.

My dad gave me great advice one year when I was worried about spending too much money during the holidays. I really took this simple advice to heart and I think about it all the time…

“Christmas is on December 25th, every year.”

The holidays timing is baked. It doesn’t rotate. It doesn’t hide. In fact, the holidays tell us they’re coming earlier and earlier each year. Yet, they arrive and we feel like we got rolled up on.

If the holidays felt stressful last year, let’s try to plug away at it in pieces earlier this year. Let’s do what we can in advance to reduce that stress.

Second thing, let’s remember the difference between presents and presence.

Extended family can be a pain, planning is a headache, but the lion’s share of this holiday stress is around finances. And that’s crazy. We all want to feel that commercial dignity of providing a great holiday for our kids. We want the kids to come out of their rooms on Christmas morning and see the real estate under the tree piled up with mounds of toys. That is a great temporary feeling.

But let’s focus on how temporary that feeling is.

When I go into my kids’ rooms today, I see loads of crap from Christmas past. These were “must-have” gifts. Now they’re dusty in back of closets, unloved, broken. You name it. When people say “kids would rather play with the box the gift came in” — that’s true.

I think about my own childhood. My parents were grinding it out for nearly two decades to provide me with tons of gifts. In all of those Christmases, I remember 3:

  • Teddy Ruxpin (I only remember this because I felt lied to. That fool wasn’t a magical bear who wanted to be my friend; he was a tape deck with fur.)
  • My Cabbage Patch Twins (they haunted me at night)
  • A new bike (that one was very cool and I got great use out of it — I have the lifelong scars on my elbows to prove it.)
The toys seem like they matter much more than they actually do.

3 gifts out of hundreds….I also remember my Star Studio, but me and my sister shared that one.

Bottom line, it’s a temporary high, but we stress ourselves out. Marketers are going to come at you (hell I’m going to have a few gift guides on this website as well) but let’s not fall into it. If money is no object this season, then by all means, make it rain Elmo’s and Furby’s. But if you only have $20 to buy your kids some gifts. Then that’s what it is. Get creative and make that $20 sing. But ultimately the kids would rather have less plastic toys and an unstressed parent engaged in the season.

I need to remind myself of this each and every year — the holidays is about being with family and the emotional and spiritual growth from spending time together.

Let’s not stress ourselves out this year.